Shout From Above!

These are the jokes they me, Thomas, Carlston, Charles and Wei Keat shared. All are from today. Yes, today, 28 of April.

Warning: Some of the jokes are dirty.

@ Lecture hall, between 8am to 12pm

Carlston: Can you shut the fuck up?
Me: Looks like every sentence he said has a bad word in it.
Charles: Somebody's horny today.
Me: I thnk Carlston haven't wank today.

Me: What poly/JC does your girlfriend go to?
Daniel: She in secondary school la.
Me: Oh, how old? 14?

@ Acer Roadshow, Atrium. Lunchtime. 12pm to 1pm.

Acer Promoter: what seemed to be the problem?
Carlston: I can't connect to the internet.
Charles: I think you watch too much girls' live webcam

Acer Promoter: Is there any important files in the computer?
Charlston: No.
Me: Are you sure? Maybe you forget to delete your browsing history. You know, the girls' live webcast.

@ Lab, 1pm to 3pm

Thomas: Friday the 13th in the cinemas is different from the one I downloaded.
Me: But the downloaded quality is still not nice. I'll wait for the dvd to come out.
Thomas: Still can see la. There's a sex scene.
Me: What? Give me now!

Charles: Why do people want to see you topless?
Thomas: Cause I'm hot mah.
Me: Wait, are you a model?
Thomas:Ya, America's next top model.
Me: No la, you should be in the "before and after" advertisment. Of course, you will be in the "before" part.
Thomas: And you will be in the "after" part...for the surgeries gone wrong advertisment.

(during group practical, we have to drill holes a steel plate)
Thomas: Faster la, how long does it takes to drill your hole.
Wei Keat: Wait.
Me: Look at the screen la. Find a spot 1st.
Thomas: He's a shemale. He's drilling a hole in front.
Me: So, you got 2 holes then. 1 at the back and 1 in the front.
Charles:The front is for breeding.

Thomas: Your hole so small xia. Only 1.24 microns. You need to go enlarge it.
Thomas: Tonight, you go Azwan's house.
Me: Hold on, where you live?
Wei Keat: Ang Mo Kio.
Me: My house better.

Me: Why you on msn? You webcam is it?
Thomas: He's webcamming with Carlston. He's doing his show.

@ Lecture Hall. 3pm to 5pm.

Carlston: I need to go to the toilet. Azwan, follow me.
Azwan: Wait, I thought I'm with Wei Keat. Take Thomas. His single.

(2 guys will sleeping were taking a "nap". One of them decided to put his head on the other one's shoulder)
Me: Why do you take the pictures?
Carlston: It's funny. You can't get to see that everyday.
Azwan: Oh ya, I forgot. Your computer is under family filter.

@ Canteen. 5pm to 6pm.

(When I was drinking peppermint ice blend)
Charles: Peppermint kills sperm.
Thomas: That's 1000 killed.

(when we were playing Fifa 09)
Me: You will get creamed.
Thomas: You will get pie'd.